February 25, 2013 - Serious Struggles

The young couple stood before me, seeking hope from the doctor from America.

As I examined their four-year-old little girl, Jenci, the truth became horribly clear. This adorable child was unable to stand, walk, or focus her eyes.

Her constant muscle twitching and spasms caused her to be unable to eat or function on her own, and she was never able to rest.

Before I spoke a word, her mother saw in my eyes that the news was not going to be good, and she started to cry. Her husband held her in a tender embrace—an unusual thing to see in their culture.

These precious parents wanted nothing more than for their little girl to be okay. They weren’t concerned with the difficulties they would face in raising a child who was going to die in a few short years. They just wanted the best for her.

It was a crushing blow when I reluctantly informed them there was no hope for her outside of God’s miraculous touch.

I have been a physician for years, but the look on this mom’s face was one I won’t soon forget. It was not desperation or anger—it was a look of selfless love for a little girl she would die for.

I don’t understand the will of God, His plans, or why He heals some and not others—but I know I am a product of His grace.

I pray that He will indeed heal precious Jenci, but God cannot be held to our desires or requirements—He is holy and sovereign, and does nothing without great purpose.

Are we to question His motives or His love for us? He gave us His only Son without reservation—that should cover it—in fact, it does.

I was heartbroken to tell this young couple that I couldn’t help them. But I will not apologize for God. His will is best even when it hurts.

When my wife, Gwen was suffering from cancer that culminated with her leaving this world for a perfect one, it wasn’t cancer that came for her that day—it was Jesus. The act of trusting Him is an incredible source of power to us. If we can look toward the big picture, we are much better for it.

Keep in mind I didn’t say look at the big picture—I said look toward it, because it’s something we cannot see in our present state. We only know that it’s there, it’s under God’s control, and we need to rest in that.

To illustrate this, allow me to tell you what I do know. A week before Gwen died, she told a dear friend that if only one person came to Christ, it was worth her suffering, dying, and leaving the life here on earth she dearly loved.

Since her death:

  • Thousands have read her story
  • Hundreds have contacted me to tell me they were convicted about situations in their lives that they were inspired to change because of what Gwen endured—and how she endured.
  • At least 14 have made life altering decisions to turn from sinful, improper relationships
  • Seven have contacted me to tell me they have accepted Christ as their Savior

We never know what trials we face. Nor do we understand the magnificent power of God.

I’m proud of Gwen—for how she lived, for the way she helped others, and the legacy she left. I will do all I can to be faithful to her memory, her life, and her spirit.

I will pray for Jenci, and ask you to pray for her too. She is a sweet little girl who can’t stop smiling, or hoping.